Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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