My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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