hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
