What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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