i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
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