They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
