i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
