the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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