He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
