I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I still have a little drunk in my system
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
