She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
