if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
