So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
