Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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