It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It's official drugs can't kill me
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
