I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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