whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
