What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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