I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
