Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
