Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
