Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize