Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
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