new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
