dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
