i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
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