why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
