Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
