About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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