Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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