I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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