im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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