i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
