the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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