I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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