I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
