i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
How many fucks given?
0.12846
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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