hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
