in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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