dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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