all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
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