so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
