i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
