I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
