Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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