i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
