if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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