What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
