u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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