Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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